Anxiety Filled Situation: The Gym.

Paul and I have been talking about getting a gym membership for a while now. It’s been one of those things though that we talk about like how we talk about having kids some day. It will happen but it’s in the very distant future. It wasn’t until the other day that he called the gym and got all the information on membership fees that I realized he was serious. He asked me if I wanted to be added to his membership now or later because I’ve said in the past that I’m not really gym ready. It sounds asinine but I feel like I need to lose some weight before I’m ready to walk into a gym. I know my thought process is flawed but it’s just how I feel, alright?! The gym is an alien universe for me and I know it become less foreign but for now I know I will feel out of place.

The few pros about this gym are:
  • all 3 facilities are 24 hours which is perfect for my third shift life.
  • the closest gym offers tons of classes and a women’s only fitness room
  • theres a pool at one of the facilities!!! I love swimming.
  • Personal trainers are offered which would be nice to book some personal training sessions once I’ve lost some weight and need to up my game.
So today we down to the gym and signed up. When we pulled up, I started to feel sick to my stomach. I knew I would be nervous but this was some pretty serious anxiety I was dealing with which came out of no where. I finally confessed to Paul how I was feeling which he comforted me and reassured me that it would be OK. “In a year, this will be old hat and going to the gym will be part of your routine,” he stated. He was right. I’m on this road to a healthier life and even though going to the gym freaks me out I had to do this for myself. I can’t wait to go tomorrow. I’m just going to wear my headphones and try to tune out all the other people who are there.

I’m doing this for me and not for anyone else


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