When Paul and I first got engaged we agreed that our wedding would be casual and not like any other wedding we had been too. We both agreed to courthouse nuptials and a small gathering in both of our home states, one in Iowa and one in Massachusetts. Since we were engaged in secret for almost year, we had the chance to plan our wedding without any outside opinions. It was glorious. We both had been to enough weddings to know what we wanted and what we didn’t. As the months came closer to announcing our engagement, we were solid in our ideas of how our weddings would be.
- No frilly wedding gown for me – I wanted a yellow dress.
- No cake cutting so we decided on cupcakes
- No bouquet toss or garter toss – ewww.
- No father/daughter or mother/son dance
- No stuffy/sappy speeches – it’s just not our style
- No mandatory kissing at the sound of glass clinking
- Fun and Games are a must
- Good food
- Good music
- Great friends/family
- We want to spend more money on a honeymoon than our actual wedding.
We announced our engagement on April 2nd and here’s where things got derailed. Everyone, I MEAN EVERYONE, has an opinion about weddings. People who have never even been married had opinions about weddings. They insisted on me wearing a white wedding gown saying that “I had to! I just had to! Everyone does!” They insisted on a grand ceremony. They suggested colors, wedding cake ideas, and even songs. By nature, I want to do the complete opposite of what everyone else is doing or telling me to do so I wasn’t swayed…yet.
It wasn’t until a friend of my mine brought me with her to get her wedding dress altered that I started to think a wedding dress wasn’t that bad of an idea. I mean looking around David’s Bridal made me re-evaluate all of my thoughts about my wedding.
Why wouldn’t I want to be enveloped in a beautiful gown on my wedding day? What made me so above it all? Why did I have to be so non-traditional? Damnit, just be like everyone else Krystle!
I tried on 2 wedding dresses that day at David Bridal and I was sold hook, line, and sinker. I felt a million dollars in these gowns, who wouldn’t really? The sales lady asked me how I would rate the dresses I had tried and both were 9-10s which apparently is rare for a first time dress trial. I chalked it up to being an easy-going bride and thought I had found THE dress. A few weeks later, I tried on several more dresses and this time I really found THE ONE. It embarrassing to admit but I almost got teary eyed while I swayed in this tulle and lace covered ball gown. Yes, ball gown. I had gone from casual sundress to ball gown in a matter of 4 dresses.
The last dress is beautiful and I think I look great in it! I mean I would wear that dress everyday if it was socially acceptable to but that’s besides the point. I would be very happy to wear it on my wedding day too but I’m not going to. We are not having a traditional wedding and wearing a ball gown in my parent’s backyard (one of the 2 venues) would feel odd and out of place. When a friend of mine was in the midst of wedding planning of her own, she was pressured into creating a wedding registry even though they just wanted money for their honeymoon. She ended up deleting it and said she heard that she shouldn’t register for things for the life she wanted but for her current lifestyle. I have applied this token of advice to wedding dress. I shouldn’t buy a wedding dress for wedding that I’m not having. There’s not going to be a procession so a 4 foot train is not needed. I’m going playing boccie and corn-hole while eating tacos so lace and tulle is a little much. Additionally, all of the dresses I tried on at David’s Bridal were all over the hefty price tag of $500. I have NEVER spent more that $150 on something for myself and I wasn’t going to do it for a dress I would only wear twice.
Now that I have come off of my little cloud, I am acting much more rational when it comes to all things wedding. It’s hard to not fall into the black hole of wedding boards on Pintrest and feel pressured to personalize everything and color code every aspect of that day but I am going to try to resist. I’ll keep you updated.